There is so much of this stuff in my ask box, and most of it not even anonymous, but I don’t want to call out any particular user because I know they’ll then get a lot of hateful asks and the cycle will just continue.
First off, there’s a comma splice in your ask. I just have to let you know that, on account of how I’m a pretentious prick.
I hope that I’m not transphobic. I’ve been public and vocal in my support for the rights of trans people for years, and I’ve tried over the years to amplify trans voices, from T Cooper to Stephen Ira Beatty, rather than pretending to be able to speak for them.
Look, I am a person, and I am not a particularly good one. I am screwed up and make a lot of mistakes. But I am not a piece of trash. I would imagine that you are also screwed up and make a lot of mistakes, but you aren’t a piece of trash either.
But it is still hurtful—very hurtful—to hear people call me a piece of trash. It just makes me sad to hear, the way I think it would make most people sad to hear. The certainty and lack of nuance in that characterization reflects a broader lack of nuance in online discourse these days that just bums me out.
I find it kinda problematic that John would respond to this. A 36(?) year old man responds to anon hate. And talk about her hurtful it was. Maybe it wasn’t the intention but it comes across childish and well, pretentious. What 36 year old says they’re “screwed up” I mean something about that just seems wrong to me, but I guess he is if he’s pushing 40 and responds to this crap. I’m all for valid criticism of him and would hope he’d respond to it maturely, but this is just “ur a piece of trash” and a self righteous pretentious rant on it. He’s proving the anon right.
I’m not entirely sure we read the same thing? I don’t intend to sound rude, but I do not see how you reached your conclusion.
Normally when someone responds to anon hate they respond with an equal amount of animosity; they are shameful, they are rude, they are angry. In this case, though, John Green responded maturely, treating the anon not as an inferior bug like most people would but as an equal. He dealt with this wonderfully. As he said, he has many of these in his ask box. Perhaps he had been ignoring them, but when they kept coming he decided to do something about it like any human being would do, regardless of their age. Further, he chose to respond to anon rather than an actual person because he knows that there are people on this site who would love to tear someone’s throat out. It happens all the time where people are forced off this site because, let’s face it, we’re not the wonderful, welcoming community we would like to pretend we are.
This is not problematic. This is a human being (I repeat, a human) responding to an ask with maturity and intelligence. What is problematic is the ask; an anon insulting someone without any evidence or support and then telling them to “go to hell”. It’s almost as bad as telling someone to kill them self. John Green is not a perfect person, as he said. No one is perfect. But he handled this wonderfully and with grace and I can only hope that more people learn to communicate like this in the future rather than resorting to anon hate, insults, and petty squabbles.
Why would a middle aged man respond to anon hate? He’s behaving like a teenager. Look, your blog has the them of TFIOS, so I don’t see the point of entertaining this. John Green has done problematic things and him responding to shit like this just makes me uneasy. He’s done shitty things and instead of addressing them he’s said “I’m not x, I support those people” rather than listening to the offended. I don’t know there’s not much point in discussing this with someone who enjoys a book about two kids with cancer where things are so contrived just for a shitty romance with no regard for people who actually suffer this shit. It pisses me off. It’s done for the sake of romance, not the narrative or anything else.
I don’t generally take the high road, so I’m going to reply to this and then stop because just by reading your comment I have realized that you aren’t seeking an intelligent, thoughtful, and mature debate. You have already reached your conclusions about everybody involved in this and have found them all wanting. It’s sad but I don’t see me changing that.
I have the TFIOS theme, it’s true. I’m a book nerd; I enjoy reading and I found TFIOS to be a very good read. I know and have lost people to cancer; it is never fun and it is not glorious. I think that is part of the reason why I enjoyed his book; it didn’t try to glorify the pain or the horror of it while still maintaining it’s status as a young adult novel.
As for the anon hate, hate is never okay and I don’t know why you are defending this particular one. If the anon actually had something legitimate to say they would have done so calmly and with maturity rather than with hate, insults, and atrocious grammar. Now I do not know what the original context was and why the anon thought that hate was the best way to go to express their anger, but this was not someone with a legitimate complaint. That was my point when I chose to reply to your comment. John Green may have done something (again, I do not know) but in this particular case, with this particular anon, he did nothing wrong, which made your comment look ridiculous.
Again, this is all I’m going to say, regardless of your reply, because I don’t want to turn this into a long, drawn out thing. I just wanted to clarify a few things that you seemed to misunderstand. I’m not saying that John Green has never made a mistake (I would never say that about anyone), but in this case he was in the right.